Friday, March 16, 2007

A mothers role










Most teenagers these days usually have a sound knowledge of sex and sexuality. All parents belive that There is no more a need for the parents to teach the children about the means and ways of sex. This is completely wrong. As a psychologist i have done research for the past 7 years on teenagers behaviour towards sex and their sexual life. Although most teens show extremly good knowledge about sex, most of them are becoming infertile. This is attributed to the fear of mastubating and a fear of sex itself. This has been found in most indian teenagers who are not so sexually exposed. These teenagers,especially boys turn out to have great sexual urge which they are unabel to release naturally. Mastubation is the natural act of reliving the sexual urge which is quiet natural. But in our system of development, mastubation is thought to be a illicit act and teenagers who try it are shunned by parents. This is mainly due to ignorance and misconseptions about it. As a psychologist it becomes by duty to inform the parents who read this blog a few facts about mastubation.









  • mastubation is a natural process and is not an abnormal act




  • mastubation does not cause infertility by any ways




  • mastubation relaxes a male from becoming violent. Teenagers tend to get more aggressive when lacking adequate mastubation




  • mastubation causes proper secretion of hormones in post growth stages which is very essential for fertility of the person throughout their lives.




  • psychologically they get a better attitude towards sex rather than fear or disgust




  • the mere act of mastubating causes them to be in control of their emotions when they are confronted with sexual allure.IF they are lacking a basic sex knowledge,then curiosity will get the best of them.





Shocking as it may sound, about 78%of teens today are not aware of proper sex and the need for sex knowledge. They have a scarce attitude towards sexual life as if it is something to be ashamed of. When they grow up with such an attitude they tend to develop a subconscient inhibition to it, thereby in future they will suppress their body from accepting sex. NEarly 90 % infertility in men is caused by this. Although india's population is increasing day by day, the number of impotent men is also increasing.











It is now the duty of every mother to teach their children that mastubating is not something to be afraid of,nor to be disgusted about. A child feels closer to a mother than a father and hence only the mother should approach in this subject. when a mother teaches this subject the teenager will feel better about their development and will grow to trust the mother with whatever that happens in their mind. Most teenagers just want to talk their heart out with their mothers,yet they are held back by the age gap and also the dignity gap.











First of all a mother should know what to teach a son or daughter. If it is a daughter a mother can easily relate herself to her sexuality and teach her about her sexual developments. But when it comes to a male child then it becomes difficult. A male teenager will not like to discuss his sexuality with anyone,but it has been found that they will share it with only a female when probed. THis is the reason why a wife often wins over a husband after marriage from the mother. WHen a mother starts talking to her son as a person and more importantly as a male,rather than as a son,then he will communicate better with her.











a male sex organ undergoes a very unique cycle that many women donot know much about. At teenage times, the male sex organ tends to grow in size.at birth the penis is covered by a fore skin. This fore skin hinders the growth of the penis, and over a period of time the penis grows out of this fore skin.







IN the case of muslims and jews, this foreskin is cut{circumsized}. this is actually a healthy procedure.





The removal or stretching of the foreskin is essential for the teenagers penis development. if the foreskin is too small and tight,then it shows lack of mastubation nad will require continued massage of penis followed by mastubation. This condition ,if left untreated will lead to shorter penis and painful intercourse.





There's a fairly wide range of normal penis sizes - just as there is for every other body part. And just like other parts of the body, how a penis appears at different stages of a guy's life varies quite a bit. Growth in penis size is just one part of puberty, which also includes such changes as pubic hair development, testicular growth, muscle development, and a growth spurt. Late starters almost always catch up fine - they just reach full maturity a little later.



once the foreskin is properly stretched, then the penis will grow to maturity. But the testis will get activated and will require the male to mastubate for it to function sxponentially. HEnce by the age of 18, a male should be taught how to mastubate.



THis situation can be very tricky for a mother to approach to her son about.it is best to ask the son first about his life and fun activities and even health. THen it is best for the mother to break the news that she wants to do the testicular examination on him. This is an examination anyone can do,but no men will allow any doctor to do this,so it is best for the mother to do this.



The two testicles, or testes, are inside the scrotum. The testicles are the male reproductive organs that produce sperm and the male hormone testosterone. Each testicle is approximately the size and shape of a small egg. At the back of each testicle is the epididymis, a coiled tube that collects and stores sperm.
The testicles develop within the abdomen of a male baby (fetus) and normally descend into the scrotum before or shortly after birth. A testicle that has not descended can increase the risk for testicular cancer.
Testicular examination
A testicular examination includes a complete physical examination of the groin and genital organs (penis, scrotum, and testicles) by you. You should feel (palpate) the organs and examine them for the presence of lumps, swelling, shrinking (testicular atrophy), or other visual signs of an abnormality. A testicular examination can detect the causes of pain, inflammation, swelling, congenital abnormalities (such as an absent or undescended testicle), and lumps or masses that may indicate testicular cancer.
An examination of the genitals is an important part of a routine physical examination for every boy and man, regardless of age. Male babies should also have their genitals examined for congenital abnormalities or an undescended testicle. An undescended testicle is more common in premature male babies than in full-term male babies.
Regular testicular examination is recommended for men between the ages of 15 and 40 to detect testicular cancer in its early stages. Testicular cancer is one of the most common cancers in men younger than age 35. Many testicular cancers are first discovered by men themselves, or by their sex partners, as a lump or enlarged swollen testicle. In the early stages of testicular cancer, the lump, which may be about the size of a pea, usually is not painful. Testicular cancer found early and treated promptly has a very high cure rate.


IT is very likely that the person examined and the person examining will get sexually aroused. the penis is likely to become erect as in the picture. This is natural and it is anther oppourtunity for a mother to teach her son to mastubate and to lead a hygenic sexual habit.


A good physical examination is essential for the genitals and this is best done by mothers for several main reasons.



  • such examination will not be liked easily, but when a mother does this the adolescent feels secure

  • it creates a better bond between amother and son

  • the son will feel more relaxed with his mother after such discussions andwill hide no facts

  • the sex life of the teen will improve considerably and a fertile future will be assured for him.

please donot neglect this issue and spoil you child's future. THis is not a topic to be shy and conserved about. do post your replies on what your observations are. I will be posting more on mother son psychology